FOX ON BUGGERS

August 15, 2003

"There are an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald's sesame seed bun" - 1001 Useless Facts.

HAVING PROMISED FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS to publish my list of the best buggers in town, I have been goaded into doing so by John Lehndorff's column in the Rocky Mountain News last week on his selection of the best of my favorite food.

John and I agree on the general criteria to be used, and our lists are not far apart with notable exceptions. My son-in-law insists that grease is better and places like Grandpa's Burger Haven and the like are the best. But I politely disagree, The Best Bugger is a hand-packed, course-ground, UN-lean (80% or fatter) plain patty served on a fresh-made bun that has substance. Some of John's choices are too lean for my taste. A few of mine John never got to taste. Neither of us could ever get to the best that may still be out there. So you need to feed us leads. Cuz it ain't over 'til the Fat Man sings.

Often time really good buggers are found in out-of-the way, sleazy taverns or eateries that neither you nor I would frequent. And often times really good ones, like my former fav at the Warwick Hotel, get changed cuz a new chef or a new food and beverage director cuts costs or has a personal preference.

I have exceptions. My number three fav, Outback Steakhouse, is not hand-packed. But it's full of flavor, dense, and beckons to be dessert as well as the main course. I have been known to order a bugger for dessert, but usually after a steak dinner. At Grandpa's Steakhouse in Kearney, Nebraska, the bugger is cheaper, better tasting, and certainly healthier than the cheesecake, so why not?

A bugger I had at Gurney's in Missouri Valley, Iowa (just across the river from Omaha) was so damn good I had a second for dessert. And both were half-ponders.

The Very Best of late I've had are not in Colorado. Sorry about that but that's the way the cookie crumbles. In addition to Gurney's, there are three eateries in Nebraska, and one in San Francisco, all of which are better than the best Denver has to offer. With the possible exception of the top two or three, But I'll leave them for a future column. One other caveat. I assume that the cooks cooked the bugger properly. I've had several instances where the bugger was not cooked properly but normally they are cooked as requested. I won't mention The Palm by name.

NMMNG'S TOP TEN:

1- 1515 Restaurant (1515 Market St, 303/571-0011). Lunching downstairs with owner Gene Tang behind the bar and serving, and Master Michael Floorwax and a friend, was an awesome event. The $10 Kobe beef bugger was a thing of beauty. Because of the high fat content (as in flavor), it had to be cooked on a flat grill rather than on a traditional char-broiler. Came a perfect medium rare, served with fab fried potato salad...yes I sed fried potato salad. Almost better than the bugger. You gotta try it, but that bugger tasted like butter.

2- Mel's Restaurant (235 Fillmore St, 303/333-3979). Here the bun really enhanced the bugger. The odd-shaped brioche bun looked icky but tasted yummy, With the thick hand-formed patty it was fabulous. It was so good, G and I and two friends dined there a few nites later and I got to have another great bugger.

3- Outback Steakhouse (8601 W. Cross Drive, 303/932-0312).There is no better meal, as a whole, in this town than here: a giant bugger, super fries, and the best salad in town. Sometimes I even skip the fries. And if you can breath after all that, the housemade, better than mine, cheesecake is the perfect end to a perfect meal. With the chocolate sauce and a spoon to eat the sauce. Cuz you don't want to screw up the cheesecake. I even do "takeaway" and the bugger is still solid pink and fantastic 20 minutes later when I get home and settled. G gets the salmon.

4- Rodney's (2819 E 2 Ave, 303/394- 3939). Since the days when Slurp Stu and I visited Rodney's regularly, he's added a "Rodney's favorite" with a bugger being cooked on a flat-grill rather than the char-broiler that all the other buggers are cooked on. The difference is distinct and remarkable. No question. The flat-grill wins, hands down. Try one of each and you'll see.

5- Dixons Downtown Grill (1610 16th St, 303/573-6100). For the same reason Rodney's is #4, Dixons is #5, altho the meat here is slightly leaner than Rodney's is. But here you have to ask to have for it to be cooked on the flat-grill or it will be cooked on a char-broiler. I really love this place, what with the beautiful rooms, the setting and the terrific service. And now that co-owner Lee Goodfriend has taught the cooks how to really cook a bugger... I do miss the chocolate cake.

6- The Palm (in the Westin Hotel, 1201 16th St, 303/825-7256), Altho there's nothing here as good as (Executive Chef Joey Profeta) Joey's Backyard Chili. The bugger, when it's cooked correctly, is tops. Fantastic. But lots of beef here doesn't get cooked correctly. It's weird. Don't know why.

7- Annie's Cafe (41012 E. 8 Ave, 303/355-8197). Tucked away off of Colorado Blvd next to University Hospital, few folks outside the area know about this super eatery. Everything from super breakfasts to the housemade pies to the yummy buggers with green chili cheese fries is consumed in great quantities every day. The bugger comes on a toasted onion roll and is just great.

8- Le Delice (250 Steele St, 303/331- 0972). I'm not sure if the bugger's been changed, but the first time I had one, it was the best in town. The last time, it wasn't quite as thick or as flavorful. But it was still a super grilled bugger on a super housemade bun. I've been told the only thing better here is the duck.

9- Manhattan Grill (231 Milwaukee St, 303/333-6444). This is a tuff call. The bugger was really yummy, but it was too wide and not thick enuf to give it greatness. It was really full of flavor and certainly needs to be on the list. Now if they made the bun half the size and the bugger twice as thick. it could be king. Gotta get back here for that turkey thingie.

10- Jack-N-Grill (2524 Federal Blvd, 303/964-9544). Finally got em to cook it rare; it was terrific. Why this tiny Mexican eatery offers so many varieties of buggers in addition to the huge selection of Mexican fare is interesting, but nevertheless they do. Try the one with the ham and hot dog on top; they sure sell a lot of 'em. But even well-done, you could tell this bugger was a winner, thick and still full of flavor. And the price is sooo looo. Shhhh. The Mexican food is even more fantastic. The adobada quesadillas are 2-die-4.

There are so many more good buggers. Honorable mentions goes to, Cafe Del Sol, Trinity Grille, CityGrille, Sam's No. 3, Pint's Pub, Cherry Cricket, and Black-Eyed Pea. Yes, the Pea is great. But Mom's Meatloaf is killer.

Whew! We sure ate lots of buggers lately.

Cya.